Moody Monday's: Time to say good-bye to 2014

tlpoague

Wow, where did the year go?

It seems like only yesterday I sat at my computer to post my first blog. Now, here I am posting the last one for the year. Time is flying by, and yet, I don't feel that much older.

This year has been a challenging one for me, both physically and mentally. All day I have contemplated what to write about. (If this was a short story, I would be done by now.) So, after much thought, and many re-writes, I will focus instead on twelve things that have impacted me this year. 

12. Kicking fear to the curb and taking the chance to start something new. I have sat with this blog being stagnant for a couple of years because I didn't know what I was doing. I'm not very tech savvy so this was a big step for me to learn something new. I am glad I did it. I have met many people that have become friends and learned quite a bit.

11. Learning how to develop myself as a writer. I have found that when I write online vs. my off-line creative writing, I tend to be pretty shallow with my writing online. (Unless it dealt with family drama.) I don't know why that is but it is something I have picked up on. In the future I will have to find a way to remedy that if I continue to write online.

10. March was a month of challenges. My faith in God, family, writing, and supportive husband helped me to keep my sanity in March with the birth of our grandson, death of my mother-in-law days later, and writing challenges. (The family was still recovering from the previous year with similar events when these happened.) I seen myself grow in many ways during this time. 

9. Selling our business and taking a vacation. (I had forgotten what it was like to sit back and relax.) I love the time I spent visiting with my son and family.

8. How faith, scripture, prayer, and a bucket of humor helps to deal with life's little box of craziness. (Of course...don't forget the family...or a loving supportive hubby.)

7. Learning to cope with someone that has cancer. I have found strength where I didn't think I had it when I found out my mother has cancer. That same strength has helped me to deal with my dad and husband's health issues. (I have seen the power of prayer working many times during this year.)
6. Planting a garden and going back to my roots. So many memories as a child involved harvesting our own food, whether it was fishing, hunting, or gardening. This year my hubby and I planted a garden and enjoyed canning it. We also enjoyed making snack sticks to munch on this winter.
5. Sometimes it is okay to take a break. With so much going on in my family, I had to step away from writing online for a bit. I felt guilty about it, but at the same time, I knew my writing would suffer if I felt I wasn't giving 100% to it. I also took this time to begin editing my novel I wrote six years ago.
4. Letting your light shine will help others to shine their's. This year I wanted to focus on my crafts as much as my writing. Along the way I was able to help others learn a craft or get back into the crafts they use to do. This has created a closer bond between us. I feel that I have learned a lot from them while helping them.
3. The friends and acquaintances I have made during this writing journey. I have wrote off and on online for five years now. I have come to know many writers during that time. This year showed me a group of writers that went the extra distance to show how much they care. From simple personal messages online, midnight chats, to taking a moment to send a card...I have developed a special bond with these people I have never met. Thank you! You will never be far from my mind and have a special place in my heart.
2. Life is crazy. Things happen. It is how we deal with it that develops our character. It has taken me a long time to see past the negativity of things that happen and look for the positive. As warped as my humor can be sometimes, it has helped me to get through some dark moments. (I am very grateful the Lord blessed me with bucketfuls of humor.) I also feel blessed beyond the worth of material possessions with the family I have. (I love spoiling my grandsons!)
1. Growing with Christ. I had my eyes opened this year to new literature I had come across. Things that I thought I knew had been erased. Things I never understood before now have a new meaning. I am excited to explore more of  these amazing avenues. For once in my life things make sense and my questions are getting answered. In this excitement, I see my writing developing into something more. Into the direction I knew I wanted to go but didn't know how to get there. If you have never heard of LA Marzulli, Rob Skiba, Steve Quayle, or Tom Horn, be sure to take the time to check them out. Amazing stuff there!
And that wraps up this year's last Moody Monday.
Due to family health issues, I will be taking a break again for awhile. I will never truly give up writing online (since it is so addictive) but it will be less consistent than my goals were this year. I have enjoyed this year of learning, growing, and developing deeper friendships. I will always appreciate the fans, readers, and writers that have been a part of this journey.
Take care, stay warm, and enjoy the new year!

Moody Monday's: Baby Fairies and Christmas

tlpoague

I woke up this morning feeling like I was sucking air through a clogged straw. My head pounding with each attempted breath.
"Not again..." I muttered, as I mustered up the energy to crawl from my cocoon.
I have been battling this cold for three day now. Today it hits like a roaring lion. But...I am stubborn! I refuse to admit  I am getting sick. I will simple tell myself that I have a mild case of allergies brought on by the snow that visited us last night.
To jump start my creative juices for the day, I decided to revisit a few of my earlier blogs after my bible study. (I need all the help I can get since my mind is short of its air intake and not firing all it cylinders.) While reading, all I could do was laugh at my warped sense of humor that Mr. P. cringes at when I slip back into my redneck ways.
This thought led me to baby fairies. Yup! I said baby fairies.
It began like this...
While visiting my daughter a few days ago, she asked, "guess what?..."
And a humorous story began.
A friend thought she may be pregnant so, she inquired the help of my daughter to take her to the store to invest in a few boxes of pregnancy testes. (They really should sell these in the bulk since some parties can't seem to believe the first one.)
This friend, frightened at the prospect of the outcome, coaxed my daughter into taking one with her.
(By now I am snickering. I can see where this is going.)
Pokey, my daughter, feeling pretty confident of her outcome said, "okay, let's pee on the stick."
(I think I snorted, while trying to suppress a laugh, when she said that.)
Time passed quickly. Then they checked the sticks. One had a blue line, the other didn't. With disbelief and thinking there was a mix up, they tried again.
By the third time, there was no doubt.
Calmly my daughter tells me, "The baby faerie hit the wrong damn person."
There was no suppressing the laugh. I snorted so hard laughing that it's no wonder I am sick now.
Composing myself, I couldn't help but ask, "So...you're about four or fives weeks?"
Pokey looked at her friend and fired off, "Don't you hate it when your mom is right?"
Then she looked at me and added, "It's all your fault!"
I beamed with pride before I said, "I hope you have twins! Two girls would be nice to add with the two boys. I think you will do fine."
I guess it was time to explain to her the miracles of God's gifts he bestows upon his children. There isn't any protection in the world to block something like that.
(If you didn't believe in God, then remember to never say the words..."I will never...". Because somewhere down the line, that never will happen.)

It was a night I will never forget. A mix of caster oil, a midnight phone call, and a race to see which would happen first...the baby or hospital. Check out...
Silly Sunday's: Pokey and baby Jr.

Thanks for joining me for this weeks Moody Monday!

A Tribute To My Mom This Mother's Day

My mom
photo by tlpoague

These last few months have been busy constructing a schedule where I can write, do other creative projects, and spend time with my grandchildren. Unfortunately, it has left little time to read, comment, and write upon my other websites as I would like. I feel myself being sucked down into a black hole where I have begun to see myself as a failure.

I felt I was letting my readers down by not being able to commit myself to being online interacting with them. I felt I was letting my daughter down by not being available when she needed me. I felt I was letting my husband down by not spending one on one time with him. This led me down the rabbit hole of letting myself down for not completing projects or writing. I didn't want to think about family drama or other issues associated with it.

So, I called the one person whom I knew would understand what it was like to spread oneself so thin.

I called my mom.

"Mom, I need some inspiration." I told her. "I am feeling like I am trying to cram to much into too little time to fully enjoy what I am doing. Now I have writer's block again...along with a string of migraines."

My mom and me
photo by tlpoague

She chuckled.

"Why are you laughing?" I asked.

"Oh, honey, I remember those days." She replied.

I was feeling deflated and defeated. Now my mother was laughing at me. Well, not at me so much as at the situation.

"I am sure your readers will understand if you can't commit to writing everyday. Just write as time allows you to. As long as you do your best, the rest will fall into place. Don't force or rush it." She coaxed. "Remember when I would get into these slumps when we were writing for HubPages? You were full of advice how to freshen up a piece or help me go in the direction I wanted. I had no clue what I was doing, but you were always a phone call away to help. When was the last time you went back to read your earlier pieces?"
Hmm, I hadn't a clue. These days I am usually thinking about it but not acting on it. Maybe it was time to find the time.

This conversation made me recall a couple of her stories from HubPages, "I Swore I Wouldn't Sound Like My Mom", "Grandmothers Are Great Teachers".

My great-grandmother and part of the crew
photo by tlpoague

Oh, how these words have come back to haunt us many a time.

I can still see in my mind's eye, my eight-six year old great-grandmother on her knees, under the kitchen table, chasing my sister, Pie, with a fly swatter for putting her toes on the table. (Elbows and feet on the table were a big taboo in those days.) My mother would just stand there with a permanent grin that included visions of herself, doing those same actions just days before. I, too, have lost count how many time I have punished my own children with the intentions of not sounding like my mother, only to realize later how sound her advice was.

"I just can't seem to get motivated to cook, clean, or finish my craft projects. I want to do it, but...I feel a streak of laziness coming on, and my son will be here tomorrow." I amazed myself with how whinny I sounded.

"So..." Mom asked, "What's stopping you?"

"Umm...dunno...lazy...unmotivated?" I pondered.

"Excuses, that is all they are...excuses. Why aren't you playing your favorite music? Why don't you make a list you want to accomplish? Why are you whining? What happened to focusing on being positive?"

Now I remembered why I couldn't stand my children whining. I learned it from my mother. Good grief...what was I doing?

So, I tried to drum up something positive. I could feel the last few wires in my brain starting to smoke as I cranked over the engine.

"I have one for you." I told Mom as I focused on an idea, "you know how sometimes you don't see yourself as being talented until someone points it out?"

"Ya," I could hear her snacking on something, while she replied in a dreamy voice. I was beginning to lose her.

"The other day, while visiting with Little Man and his wife, I tried to show off my skills and whip up a meal from scratch."

"Oh," was the bored response.

"Yup, I could have broke the record with the worst apple crisp in the history of my baking." I began to brag.

Suddenly, as if the current changed, I could feel my mother's interest perk up. This was news to her. Rarely do I screw up something so simple.

"What happened?" She asked. Her curiosity sparked.

"Well, ya know how hard it is to cook at a hostess's place when they lack the ingredients and tools needed?" (I happened to be cooking at my son's place he had recently moved in to. He hadn't stocked up the place yet.)

"Ya..."

Excited, I took a deep breath and launched into my story.

"I decided I wanted to make chicken noodle soup, with homemade noodles, mashed potatoes, and an apple crisp. I lacked a rolling pin, so, I made due with patting it out with my hands. Then I nearly took off a few fingers trying to cut the onions, carrots, and celery with a cheap knife. I had to use a tiny, flexible, paring knife to peel potatoes while chatting with Little Man's wife.  She was busy helping peal the apples for the crisp. That reminded me of Grandma M always scolding us for not peeling our produce paper thin. This caused both of us to laugh because we looked like we were taking chunks out of our peelings. After our task was done, Mrs. Man stepped back to watch me work in the kitchen. She was telling me that it amazed her how I could whip around so fast, multitasking, and still being able to hold a conversation. I must have had her pretty fooled, because I felt like I was a bit crazy and forgetful. She told me about how Little Man tried teaching her how to drive a stick shift. She mentioned that she had a hard time getting past second gear. I couldn't blame her, it took me forever to learn. Of course, I didn't mention this, I was too busy not burning anything and attempting to remember how to make the apple crisp. Then I remembered the kiddo had a cookbook I gave him. So I whipped it out, while Mrs. Man finished her story, and realized I needed a few more ingredients. So, off we headed to the store."

I paused for a moment for a breath.

I couldn't hear anything at the other end.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Ya, I'm here." Mom replied, "So, then what happened?"

"We jumped in the car and picked up our stories where we left off, till about a block away, when she interrupted me. She asked if I was driving a stick. Not thinking about it I said...ya, why? She gave me a look that asked...is there anything you can't do?
Gosh, I just assumed everyone knew the things we do. It didn't register that for some people they may not know how to bake, cook a certain item, crochet, or do many other homemaking skills.
This was about the time I realized how much we had in common. She was interested in learning how to do the things I was taught as a youngster. She couldn't believe that even Little Man knew how to do the basics of crocheting.
I mean, these are things that are common in our family. I grew excited at the prospect of teaching her, and others, what I have been taught. I love that I was given the ability to learn so much from my grandmothers and you. I feel really blessed that God has given us so many talents. Oh, ya, as for the apple crisp, I forgot to add the sugar, a dot of butter, and flour to it just like Grandma did"

It was in those precious moments that I realized, without saying much, my mother had given me a gift.

The motivation I was looking for.

My mom and my daughter
photo by tlpoague

I took a few moments to look beyond myself to my daughter and how far she has come. She is leading the next generation down a similar path as the ones the women before us have taken.

I just want to say thank you, Mom, for all your support. P.S., you'll need to check your posts on HubPages now. No more excuses...*smiles*

I'll look forward to seeing y'all again tomorrow for Moody Monday!
  

Welcome to Moody Monday

tlpoague

Welcome to the first Moody Monday Blog.
Are you having one of those days where you want to crawl back in bed and start the day over? Would you like to share your thoughts and feelings about it? Drift on over. You have come to the right place. I welcome you to Moody Monday.
Moody Monday was created as a way to express joys or vent the heart out. You can share any emotion that pulls your strings. (I will try to have the tissues ready if you need one. Laughs are life's best prescriptions.)
Just to give a brief description for those that would like to join the fun...there are no rules or commitments. Time is precious for a writer. Sometimes it is hard to commit to a new project. The only thing that I ask is to leave a comment to let others know you are here and a link to your Moody Monday. (Feel free to use the photo of Moody Monday. Just add the caption tlpoague) That way we can spread the love.
Grab yourself a cup and let's get this party started!

photo by momster

My mood today that I would like to share is CHAOS! I know, I know, chaos really isn't a mood but I feel like my mind is spinning enough to give myself whiplash. My emotions are like a roller coaster stuck in overdrive.
Organized chaos can only begin to skim the surface of what I am feeling, as I try to prep to get this blog ready. Excitement bubbled over starting something new. That quickly drifted to fear of screwing up. I was plagued with doubt. I did screw up trying to figure out the codes for my links. (I am by no means computer tech savvy.) My chest hurt as a panic attack threatened to freeze me in concern. (What made me think I was capable of pulling this off?)
"Take a deep breath..." I told myself as I saw spots form before my eyes.
What is the worst thing that can happen?
Focus. Focus again. There...that wasn't so bad. I made it. I have wrote my first blog on this step to an amazing adventure.
No worries that it will fail. If anything it is one more step to freedom as a writer. No more doubt. No more anguish. Only the outcome of something good.
I am a person. Flaws happen. I know I can get over my Fear of Failure...if only I try.

tlpoague 2014

Hello Silly Sunday! March 30, 2014

Photo by tlpoague

Good morning blogging world! Welcome back ! Drag up a chair, fill your cup, and welcome to my box of craziness. It is a fabulous day here with the sun shining and a whopping 70 degrees. I think we finally found Spring. 

Just a quick note, this will be my last Silly Sunday I will be posting. My writing schedule is looking to change this next month. Please bare with me as I sort out the details.

I will be starting a Moody Monday for anyone whom may be interested. Just send me a shout out if you would like to join. There are no rules and no commitment. I am working on getting a link inserted into my blog so you can link yours. I'll be beginning tomorrow. I think it will be a great way to share some joy or just vent your heart out.

I had an interesting phone call the other day. I called my mom for a change to check in and pick her brain for ideas. (I have had a crazy week of mixing up my days and nights that I feel fried my last brain cell. Of course, in my case, that doesn't take much.)

We started our little chat playing catch up with the family. She told me about the weather where she is, while I shared with her Pie's and Bean's latest adventures. (My week was pretty dull next to theirs.) Pie was at work one day when a cockroach decided to pay her a visit. He made his dramatic announcement by landing on her head as she was sorting statements. (I would have loved to been a fly on the wall to see that one.) Bean had to do some Redneck repairs to her kitchen sink. She had to conduct a massive blow out to a clogged drain. (I'm glad I wasn't there for that one. I hear the smell was awful!)

This conversation somehow led to April Fool's Day coming up. (Do you have your list of April Fool's gags ready?) I couldn't help but share about my famous Road Kill Jerky prank I wrote about. Mom said the best one she pulled was convincing one of my siblings to check their blinker fluid. (You know you are out of blinker fluid when the blinker doesn't turn on.)

Soon we were laughing as we discussed how this younger generation hasn't a clue about old fashion terms or items...such as...

What is a mothball?

Moth balls are toxic white balls that deter certain bugs from haunting your house. (My mother had asked a clerk this one day while shopping. When the clerk asked what a moth ball was...mom's reply simply was...if you don't know what one is, chances are you don't carry them.)

What is oleo?

Oleo is an old fashion term used back in the grandparent's day for butter. (One of my siblings thought this was a type of cookie.)

What is lard?

Lard is animal fat that has been rendered down to a solid substance similar to shortening. (My sister had fun trying to explain this one to a store clerk.)

The most priceless one that had me roaring was...

What is elbow grease?

I have lost count how many children have fallen for this one. (Myself included!) I was cackling with laughter watching a cousin search under every sink in the house and household product for elbow grease. When she finally exhausted herself, she stated, “I think we are out of elbow grease. I can't find any anywhere. (Her poor mother could hardly keep a straight face as she explained that elbow grease came from how hard you used your arm to scrub a spot. I thought my cousin was going to have a fit.)

As our conversation wound to an end, I told mom that Bean had pulled a good one on her boys. She told them to be careful how they acted, otherwise they would reap what they sow with their actions. One of them told her, he couldn't reap anything because he didn't know how to sew.

Ahh, look at the time. Well, I suppose I should pretend to get some work done. I thought about getting a pass to the gym, then I realized. Free exercise...clean house!

So, in closing, I would like to mention again that if you are interested in joining the Moody Monday, just let me know. (gabbyone72@hotmail.com) I will do my best to get you linked in. (Unless I can get that nasty button to work for me, then you can just add your link.)

Y'all have a good one and see ya Monday.

tlpoague 2014

Everything Susan

If you would like to read other Silly on Sundays, check out Everything Susan and RealHousewife.

Today's Throwback Thursday March 13, 2014

photo by tlpoague

I asked this question yesterday to see how others would answer...Have you ever had one of those days were you just want to crawl back in bed and start the week over?
I have been struggling this week with the pressures of FAMILY DRAMA. Coming from a large family it doesn't take much to set off the honeycomb. I don't know about others, but in my family, when this happens it will set the bees buzzing for hours. Sometimes this will make for some interesting stories to write about. Other times, if allowed too, it can affect one's writing. This is where my struggle began.
I have set a goal in my writing. I knew this would be the most difficult thing for me simply because I have a large family and things happen. To avoid some of these issues, I have begun to set rules. But again, things happen.
To simply put it, this is how my week has went so far. (Take a deep breath...)
Thursday of last week, while my daughter was visiting-and wondering if she would ever have her baby-we received news concerning my mother-in-law. She has been sick with a quick acting leukemia. Family was called in to say their good-byes.
Friday my daughter had her beautiful baby. (If curious how that went check out Silly Sunday.)
Saturday was family bonding hour with the new baby and a rambunctious 14 month old.
Sunday started with a phone call that my mother-in-law had passed. This posted a delay in my writing since the family tree on both sides of the family needed contacted. (Have you ever tried a five way phone call that lasted over four hours? It can be done!)
Just when I thought I had a handle on things and was enjoying telling the story of my grandson, I received another disturbing phone call. My brother, with his kids, had been in a car accident. No one was hurt but the trailer and equipment behind it. This set the bees buzzing again. By the time I had called one of my sisters-once again-she answered...without even a hello, "if this is more bad news, I don't want to hear it till tomorrow." It was...a friend of the family had passed.
I couldn't help but question where I would find the time to finish my writing. Amazingly, without more interruptions, I did.
Monday was spent with a trip to the doctor, in a town, five hours away. I did manage to find time to write my first hub of the month for HubPages.
Posting the hub was another story. Have you ever spent an hour, working hard on your masterpiece, only to click the wrong button, and watch it disappear before you eyes? I did! I wanted to have a stroke. I had forgotten that the work was still saved. It just moved to the bottom of my list. In my wild state of panic, I couldn't find it, so I started the whole process over again. Then, I did what I usually do...I called my sister, Momster. She is always helpful when it comes to finding humor through the negativity. It was during this phone call that I realized I had forgotten she was out of town. She had taken her son in for surgery. He needed pins put in a finger he had broken, while at school. That was my Tuesday.
Wednesday, I had the perfect topic picked out. Wordless Wednesday's word for the day was going to be frustration. It was frustrating that I couldn't get my words to flow. I started two different articles, but still, I couldn't find the humor in them. (This is how I deal with trauma...I mean drama....writing and humor!) I finally found my voice only to be interrupted. My daughter was bringing the grandboys over. And so...I didn't get to finish my articles, but after asking for help on Facebook, I did figure out how to find my little bit of humor.
Today is a funeral for a friend in the family. It is also going to be spent going, out of town, to the doctor's again for another family member. (This is what happens when you live in the sticks.) I am taking along my trusty notebook and a well sharpened pencil, with the hopes that I can find my next story lurking around the corner. If by chance I don't find the time to post my Friday story, know that I am attending my mother-in-law's funeral, and thinking about when I can get back to writing.
"How do you keep you sanity in all of this?" You ask. It is my faith I have in my Lord and Savior. When times seem difficult I reflect on the scripture, Philippians 4:13, "I can do all thing through Christ which strengtheneth me." Then I did deep and seek the humor.
tlpoague 2014

Signs Of Too Much Drama While Drinking Too Much Java

My powder-puff Bella
photo by tlpoague

On a normal day I find I can laugh in the face of drama. Today, however, it has escaped me. Patience found a fine time to take a vacation. El groucho took its place. 

It began with an abusive stream of sunlight, filtering threw the lace curtains, that burned bright, red, orbs into my eye lids. Instead of dragging myself out of bed to close the door, I made an attempt to roll over, only to find I was tied into my sheets. (Don't ask me how, even I couldn't figure it out at first.) So, with a haze of fog covering my brain cells, I managed to stumble from my warm cocoon.

I could smell the hot java coaxing me to the kitchen. The frigid floors and arctic whisper of a breeze kissed my body into alertness. I was beginning to miss the abusive sunlight. At least it had warmth to it.

With numb hands, beginning to tingle back to life, I cautiously poured my liquid crack into a mug. I knew within moments, whatever the cool air didn't bring to life, the molting java would. Mug to my lips, I felt a tap on my leg. I looked down into a cotton ball of white and a pool of brown eyes. My beast was letting me know that it was time for her doggy crack too. Grunting, I poured her a cup, doctoring it with the usual dose of cream and sugar.

She sniffed it, snorted on the floor, then headed to the door. I guess she felt she needed to go out and take care of business first. (Better outside than inside like yesterday...) Before I could take care of my own business, she was scratching to come in.

Mumbling to the hubby about today's tasks, I dug out my notes so I wouldn't forget the necessary items I needed to take care of before I could get to my addiction of the day...writing!

(Normally I try to begin my day with a cup of java and a bible study.)

Today, I thought to myself, why not tackle a few phone calls before getting dressed. This way I could mentally prep myself for the freezing temperatures awaiting me outside. (I could do my bible study afterward so I wouldn't feel rushed.)

Phone call number one:

Me: “Good morning, I was calling about a prescription that I haven't received yet. It was suppose to be sent a week ago. Sure, I will hold.”

Call is transferred to a different department.

Me: “Good morning, I am calling about a prescription I haven't received yet. Yes, I will hold while you check.”

A few minutes pass...

Me: “What do you mean you don't have orders for a prescription? It was ordered a week ago? Whom do I need to talk to to straighten this out? I don't remember the doctor's name. Yes, I will hold.”

Call is transferred to a different department.

Me: “Hi, I am calling...yes, I'll hold.”

The automated voice is beginning to grate a nerve...three minutes pass.

Meanwhile, I attempted to fill in the hubby what is going on. Since he is preoccupied with another task, the information is filtered from one ear and out the other; followed by a series of “what did you say again?..”

The operator comes back on the line.

Me: “Okay, I was calling because I needed to find out whom the doctor was I had seen so I could get a prescription filled. What do you mean you can't give out that information?”

I feel the tingling of a migraine begin.

Me: “You have to call that department and then they will call me? How long will this take? You don't know? Okay, what is your extension so I can call back if they don't call me?”

I hung up the phone. 

Be calm, breath, it's no big deal...calm, breath, it's not big deal. I was not ready to start my day like this.

Phone call number two:

Me: “Hi, I am calling because...yes, I can wait.”

The hubby quizzes me... “what's up?”

Me: “What do you think, I'm on hold again. Oops, sorry...yes, I was calling to let you know that we needed to cancel our catering job. No, I didn't need a caterer, it was one your party scheduled for us to cater. We will be unable to cater the party because of an injury sustained from a previous job. Okay, thank you.”

Hubby: “Did you have to give them so many details?”

Me: “Um, yes...”

I head back to the kitchen for a second dose of java...I could tell I would need every ounce of it. My expensive Q-tip of a dog decided she needed a second dose too. Well...why not...

I head to the bedroom to get dressed. Waiting for me, just inside the door, was a pile of what-should-have-been folded clothes arranged in a dandy nest, complete with the basket lying on its side. I glanced at the powder puff. She tilted her head to her right side, black lips curled in what-could-only-be described as a grin, and teared up those big, brown eyes. I felt the words...who me?...blaze into my brain while staring back, with a scolding look. She dropped her head. Then she proceeded to plop her 12 pounds of fluff into my chair and stare at me with a pout.

I gave up on finding clothes that weren't wrinkled and dressed. (May as well get the errands over before it started to snow again.)

I bundled up, grabbed the pile of bills that needed to be paid, kissed the hubby, and headed out the door. Immediately, my nose felt like it had been bit by an icicle. I felt the liquid begin to pool in my sinus cavities. I hurried to the truck and dumped my junk into the seat. It would be just my luck that I would miscalculate how cold it was and forget to grab gloves. Being too lazy to run inside, I made due with tucking my hands into my coat sleeves.

I took a deep breath to calm my nerves while telling myself I needed to work on patience. I turned the key to start the truck. Nothing. No clatter of a dead battery. No click of a connection trying to spark. Nothing.

I removed my cold limbs from the vehicle. Grabbed my frozen junk and fumed into the house.

Maybe I should just go back to bed and start this day over...beginning with my bible study.   

How was your day?

My Silly Sunday-February 24, 2014

photo by momster

I had planned on writing this post
many...many...many...hours ago but became a bit distracted by a phone call. I should have known that when I got distracted by the phone call, it would be awhile before I could get back to my post. It has now been five hours, twenty-nine minutes, and thirty-seven seconds later.
Oh, how I love my sisters!
I needed some inspiration for today's topic. Boy, did they provided me with more than I needed. (Along with a bucket of laughs.)
Of course with any topic we discussed I had to do some censoring before I could post them. What could three girls possibly have to talk about for five hours? Trust me, I am not sure you want to know all the details...so...I will just list a few.
The topics of the day started with:
How to text with a broken thumbnail...
How to text with a dog bite on the finger...
Do you sleep text...
I don't text period, so none of these applied to me. I simply folded laundry while listening to the chatter. As an idea hit, I took notes to add to my writing later.
The next topics caught a bit more of my attention when one sister was telling the other about our dad and his latest adventure.
What was your latest Redneck household repair...
(Note to self....remember to unplug the phone cord, before cutting it, to repair it.)
How clean is your house...fur balls or kid's cloths...
How much multitasking can you get done on a four way phone call...
(We decided to call mom so she wouldn't feel left out.)
Apparently some of these topics must have been too boring because it let to a morbid story of the week between the girls...this was where the censoring came into play.
While traveling...got gas?...
How do you know when a mothball goes bad...
This had me laughing hard enough to start snorting, which woke up the dog, that gave me a dirty look, which let to me laughing hard enough, I knocked over a pile of laundry.
Under normal conditions none of this would be funny, but listening to Momster tell the story was hilarious. She went into great detail about how her twenty-six year old friend was quizzing her about moth balls. He had never seen or heard of one before. Before she could stop him, he had grabbed one out of the box and proceeded to check it out. He sniffed it. He squeezed it. She asked him if he was going to lick it. Then she told him that they were so toxic he needed to wash his hands under water for fifteen minutes. Being a germ-a-phobe, he gave it twenty minutes. Afterward he asked if mothballs went bad. (She has me roaring by then. If you aren't laughing...well, I guess one had to be there...)
While having this discussion, Momster's twelve year old son came into the kitchen to tell her that he forgot to mention he had flushed a large plastic container of soap down the toilet. (This happened hours before...after many people went...well you know...)

photo by momster

This led to an hour of listening to her debate with her son.
How did you flush a plastic container of soap down the toilet...
It doesn't matter who did it...why did you flush it...
How do you plan to get it out...
It is not my fault you flushed it down the toilet...
By now, both Pie and I, are nearly on the floor laughing. Only at Momster's could this much drama happen...and it was only two hours into her day. We listened in as she asked her son...
Have you ever done a cavity search on a toilet...today is your lucky day!...
Okay...here is what you are going to need...
Today, I have managed to snorted coffee while laughing, choked on my food, had images burned into my brain that never will leave, nearly wet myself, finished my laundry, and all the while...laughed till my sides hurt. When asking my sisters what they did today, their answer...smoked cigarettes, ate some food, and laughed our rear off.
What is your anti-stress therapy today?

Tomorrow's topic of the day:
The signs of too much drama while drinking too much java...

I have recently joined the SOS group, (Silly on Sunday's) with Everything Susan and RealHousewife. If you are interested in sharing your silly stories, you can link up here... Silly on Sunday's with Everything Susan.

Everything Susan

tlpoague 2014